I wish I could say this was the first time I've ventured down the weight loss highway. Alas, I have travelled this road numerous times in my 29 years of life. In fact, just 3 years ago I was in the middle of a successful trip where I lost 34 pounds. I reached a happy weight, was working out like a fiend and loving it and was really and truly happy with my body. I was engaged to a man I loved, going back to school to pursue a career i was passionate about. Things were looking up.

Then I got pregnant. Not planned but a happy event in our lives. I had full intentions of eating well and exercising throughout my pregnancy. About a week later, I had some spotting during a workout. Doctor said it was probably nothing but I should take it easy and lay off the exercise for a while. I interpreted a while to mean 12 weeks.

Eating well takes on a new meaning when even watching your fiance eat a chocolate bar made your stomach turn. There was very little I found appetizing. So what i craved, i ate. As that was very little I only gained 5 pounds in the first 3 months. Well on track. Then the naseau left and I ate everything in sight and did not pick back up on my workouts. Gained 12 pounds in a month!!!!!!!! Even though I reigned things in after that and started to walk, I still gained 47 pounds by the end of my pregnancy.

I discovered that getting married 8 weeks and 2 days after giving birth is one hell of a motivation to lose the weight. When I walked down the aisle I was within 5 pounds of my prepregnancy weight and everyone told me that I did not look like a woman with a newborn. Immediately after the wedding I started the Couch 2 5K program and ran the race for the cure in October (4 months later).

I look back and wonder what happened. I never really got back to eating healthy. Most of my weight loss was due to nursing and running. So when winter hit and running happened less and less but the ice cream and chocolate continued to be eaten the pounds started creeping back on. By Jan 1 I was up 15 pounds. By Easter is was 25. And now it's almost August and I'm lost. I've started exercising again but it's just keeping things in check. It's the eating that is doing me in, whether I like it or not.

So today, I'm starting fresh and I'm starting small.

1. Cutting out soda - this is so freakin hard you would not believe it. The caffeine withdrawal headache kicked in around 1 pm and I'm holding back a lot of cursing and talking down to people because I know the irritability is not their fault.

2. No junk food before noon or after 5. I'd gotten into the habit of stopping at the gas station on the way to work for a pepsi and chocolate bar. And evenings are when my husband and I enable each other with all manners of junk food.

Today I made it through both of these. Not easy at all. Hard as hell, actually. But I made it and it feels good.